oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
