he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
