operation have a gay friend backfired
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
