you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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