and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Randomize
