STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
