HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
