I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize