I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
