we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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