Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
