I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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