Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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