You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
