hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
