did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize