I have demons in me.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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