I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
