Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If that was your dad, he is hot
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize