just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Randomize
