her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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