well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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