So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
it hurts more in the daytime
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
