I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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