nut hugger
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
