Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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