Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
