I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
last night I used snow as a chaser
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
