I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Randomize
