I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Floor bacon is actually really good
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
