Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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