is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
worst night to have a conscience
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
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