let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
