Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
