Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
