I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Randomize