You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Randomize
