That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize