Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
