i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
