put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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