I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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