dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize