Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Randomize
