David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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