hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
