: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
