Those balls look pretty dangerous.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
