none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
