Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Randomize