Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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